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Wednesday, 23 November 2011 - (Penang, Malaysia) I'll have none of that in my van

We spent the whole day today stuffed in the back of a minivan for the drive down to Malaysia. Not a bad day to be stuck in a van though - it poured down all day.
Our van had a few rules we all had to abide by. There would be no smoking, or fondling of fellow passengers.		And there would be no food, guns, or intercourse in the back. Good thing Kristina and I saw this else we might have got in trouble (for eating food that is).

Thursday, 24 November 2011 - (Penang, Malaysia) Temples, hills, arse-enders, and food

It was a rather a quiet day for the camera today, but not so for the scooter we hired when Kristina drove it up the arse of a stationary car after not paying attention during a lane change hahaha! Anyway, the shot on the left is looking over the Malaysian island of Penang from the huge temple on the right - Kek Lok Si Temple, the largest Buddhist temple in Malaysia.

Construction started on this complex in 1890, took over 20 years to complete, and was largely funded by donations. And it comes complete with this 36.5m-high bronze statue of some chick called Kuan Yin - the goddess of mercy.

From the temple we went to check out what is supposedly the nicest the beach on the island. Although there was nothing especially wrong with it, it just didn't compare to the likes of what we've been enjoying over the last several days in Phuket and Ko Phi Phi, so we left that and carried on. We then found Penang National Park but decided to leave that until tomorrow, so instead I screwed the scooter for a scenic drive through the hills in the middle of the island.

Most everything we've heard about Penang revolves around its food. Lonely Planet goes as far as to call this place home to the best food in Malaysia. Food stalls like this are plentiful and sell all manner of shit, and it's cheap! Hold the food poisoning.

Friday, 25 November 2011 - (Penang, Malaysia) Monkey muggings

So we spent the day clambering our way through the jungle in Penang National Park. At all of 2,500 hectares this is the smallest national park in the world, but it sure is a nice one! There are trails throughout leading to various bits and pieces of interest, so we picked one and set off.

Before long we found some more monkeys (we've seen a lot during this trip), and Kristina was freaking out over all the attention they were giving her because of the food in her hands hahaha!

Our trail followed the north-western coast of Penang Island, past beaches and over cliffs and so forth.

Some time later, right after I took the photo on the left of this really interesting tree, Kristina was mugged right here in broad daylight by a lone monkey, who stole her bag of chips hahaha! She was walking in front of me, and suddenly stopped and let out a cry when she noticed this ballsy little bastard charging at her hehe. Actually he was charging for the plastic bag she was holding that contained a bottle of water and a bag of chips, which she threw in the air before hiding behind me. The monkey pulled the bag of chips out, shot up the nearest tree, tore into them and proceeded to eat them right in front of us hahaha - it was the funniest shit I've ever seen! There was a moment when he paused right beside me while looking for an escape route where I could have kicked him in the head, but over a bag of chips I figured what's the point (had it been something of value there'd be a monkey with a bad headache right now). I did however hit him with the bottle of water when I hurled it up at him hehe. He ran off but there was no way he was letting go of those chips. Kristina later admitted she'd be no good in a robbery - "Aaargh you want my chips?! Here, take 'em! Aaargh!"

After two very sweaty hours and a bag of chips lighter, we made it to our destination - the aptly named Monkey Beach (although we didn't actually see any monkeys here).

This is considered to be one of the few pristine beaches left on Penang Island because it is not as exposed to the pollution found along the western coast. Furthermore, it's also one of the few that are safe for swimming - most of the other beaches here are infested with jellyfish.

We (Kristina) decided we couldn't be bothered spending another two hours walking back again and getting assaulted by monkeys less than a tenth our size, so we made some friends on the beach and all chipped in for a taxi boat back. Tomorrow it's back in a minivan or a bus or God knows what for a five-hour drive to our next Malaysian stop - the Cameron Highlands.

Saturday, 26 November 2011 - (Cameron Highlands, Malaysia) What, no pork?!
I didn't take any photos today - we spent it in another minivan, this time bound for the Cameron Highlands. The Highlands are one of Malaysia's most extensive hill areas, covering an area of around 700 square kilometres. And from what we saw during the drive here it's pretty bloody nice - very green and lush. After arriving and dumping our stuff, we headed straight out to find some dinner. Malaysia is a predominantly Muslim country, and apparently Muslims don't dig on swine (much like the Jewish). The menu in our restaurant stated quite clearly "We don't serve pork" - I was horrified! Pork for me is right up there with chocolate milkshakes, and all I wanted after reading that was some pork hahaha! I settled for lamb instead. Anyway, we've established that although this area is quite nice there's not a lot of really interesting must-sees, and it rains a lot. That being the case, we've organised to do some tour in the rain tomorrow, and then we're heading straight to Kuala Lumpur the following day.

Sunday, 27 November 2011 - (Cameron Highlands, Malaysia) Random-ass tour

Our day today started with tea - lots and lots of tea, specifically a tea plantation. The cool moist climate of the Cameron Highlands combined with its altitude (1,200 metres / 3,900 feet above sea level) makes for perfect growing conditions for tea plants. This particular plantation is the BOH Tea Plantation - the largest in Malaysia. Anyway, this was the first of seven stops as part of a half-day tour through this area of the highlands.

BOH is the largest black tea manufacturer in Malaysia, founded in 1929 by a British businessman (which figures - those Poms sure do love their tea) during the British colonial era of Malaysia. They have a factory in the middle of their plantation here, and our second stop was a quick tour through the plant. Basically the tea leaves are cut, sent over to this factory, and this machine here munches the hell out of them. They're then left to ferment, are dried, sieved and sorted, and packaged.		This dude, really loves his job.		What I really needed was a coffee ;)

Stop number three was a rose garden - lots and lots of roses!

				Check out the Malaysian version of Mr Bean here. He was part of our tour, and apparently got lost in this garden which held us up hehe.

Stop four was a bee farm - lots and lots of bees, and honey! Malaysia's largest indoor maze is also here, but we didn't have time to enjoy that. Probably a good thing as Mr Bean almost certainly would've got lost in there.

Then from bees to butterflies, stop five was a butterfly farm - lots and lots of butterflies!

Out the back are a range of creepy crawlies including beetles (getting it on by the look of it), spiders, scorpions, snakes, and... rabbits.

Stop six was a strawberry farm - lots and lots of strawberries! Lunch therefore consisted of strawberry cheesecake, strawberries and cream, and strawberry milkshakes - booya!

And what random-ass tour would be complete without a stop at yet another Buddhist temple, with freakishly large fish out the front. Yes, this was stop number seven, and so ended our tour hehe. Interesting day. Tomorrow morning we jump on a bus bound for mighty Kuala Lumpur!

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